example of a bad example.  Bad example of a Jesus-dependent.  And growing me in self-awareness so I could see the real me, and for convicting me of my pride in disliking the real me, so I could begin to accept, even enjoy, the real me, so I could begin to accept, even enjoy, others, especially…

Except when I’ve been freshly convicted of the sin of independence/confidence-I-know-what’s-best.  ShepherdDave HATES uncertainty, lives in denial of how much he HATES trusting Jesus, wants to KNOW what’s next, so if next is not to his liking, he can try and control the outcome.  Evil.  Wicked.  Worldly.  Malcontent. —ShepherdDave, who imagines himself a good Christian,…

and so is choice? WHAT? Dave, are you out of your mind? Now wait. Well. If you aren’t a control freak, I guess freedom and choice are good things, but lemme tell you what I’ve discovered about myself. I don’t handle freedom well. Because of my fleshly independence. Leaning on my own understanding, being wise…

Drive alone.  Radio off.  Listen to nothing, except your inner self.  Pay attention to your thoughts, feelings, reactions as you observe others, and their driving ability, courtesy, and their tastes, decisions concerning their houses, businesses, whatever. It’s good to have a foundation of grace in your life, so you have rock-solid confidence of Jesus’ unconditional…

of a follower of Jesus, or a bad example of a hubby, father, grandfather, great-grandfather. Or a bad example of ANYthing. Who wants to be a failure, loser, bad example? Not ShepherdDave. ShepherdDave has passionately avoided being a bad example all his Christian life, and instead has strived with all his might to be a…

in the life of ShepherdDave. In the Church, only we Christian malcontents are intense, hurried, agendafied. Don’t get in the way of a Christian malcontent. Only we Christian malcontents, are passionate about achievement, excellence, being better, doing better, making a difference in the world. Ambition. Only we Christian malcontents experience fear, frustration, discouragement, boredom. Only…

…not achievement, success, striving, proving.  At least I’d LIKE that to be my focus.  Contentment with who I am today, what I have in Jesus, and what I have in the way of possessions, like my car.  No more contemplating my next car, even though it might be ten years away.   Irrational obsessing.  Living in…

all my life, I now realize.  I have never thought of myself as a malcontent, but I think I’ve always been trying to be happier.  Better car, next car, better house with an awesome view, or out west, better health, better wealth, better follower of Jesus.  So I could be happier.  I’ve evidently had this…

stressful, unpeaceful, is the confidence I have, that I know what will make me happy.  Or happIER.  Where does this confidence originate?  In the pit of Hell.  Wise in my own eyes, leaning on my own understanding.  Independent, not Jesus-dependent.  Proud, not humble.  Death, not LIFE. I’m not content with Jesus and His imputed worthiness,…