My struggle to understand Scripture

only bothers, irritates, discourages me, when I’m proud/confident-I-know-what’s-best/INdependent/worldly.  Understanding-idolatry has been a human problem, and an unconfessed sin, since the Garden.  My flesh HATES me not understanding Scripture perfectly, HATES me feeling less-than, inadequate, weak, needy, and LOVES me feeling strong, confident, LOVES easy, HATES harrrd, LOVES when I get my way, reach my goal, feel successful, competent, capable, witty, charming.

But when I’ve been freshly convicted of my INdependence — my understanding-idolatry — my wanting to feel good about myself apart from Jesus — my dissatisfaction with Jesus and His imputed worthiness, I’m liberated about not understanding Scripture perfectly,  I don’t mind at all, being pitied by others for my weakness, neediness, inadequacy, dependency on Jesus.  Ahhh, I’m not alone.  My life and my understanding of things, is not up to ME, but up to my SovereignShepherdJesus.  Ahhh.

— Dave McCarty, GospelFriendships, extra grateful right now for the convicting work of the Spirit

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