What’s better than somebodiness/success?

Not needing somebodiness/success.  What’s better than being respected, admired, envied?  Having a healthy-indifference to anyone’s respect, admiration, envy of me.

How does one obtain a healthy-indifference to the somebodiness his flesh CRAVES?  Jesus provides this to those who are aware of the problem and want help — who want to be rescued from the prison of approval addiction — not just others’ approval, but my own approval of me.

Self-awareness without self-acceptance is a miserable existence.  Most live in denial of their misery.  I’ve not been very-self-aware or very-self-accepting all my life, until recent years.  A free ebook, that I didn’t write, has been used of Jesus to grow me much-more-self-aware and much-more-self-accepting.  Much-more healthy-indifference.  If you’d like a copy of the book, and my notes about how Jesus has used it in my life, lemme know.

—Dave McCarty, GospelFriendships

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Powerful story.

Ten-minute video.  Compelling, convicting-and-therefore-faith-building, about the benefit of suffering.  I loved it.  Caused me to order her book, and I rarely buy books these days.  My ADD.  I don’t even like long articles.  Book hasn’t been delivered yet.

http://www.desiringgod.org/vaneetha#modal-195039459

—Dave McCarty, GospelFriendships

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Jesus has been deprogramming me

from the worldly brainwashing I’ve been receiving all my life — outside the Church, and INside, that humans know what’s best, that I’m supposed to be wise in my own eyes, lean on my own understanding, be confident-I-know-what’s-best.  And He’s been using my car.  Driving all alone, as I pay attention to my thoughts, feelings, reactions, I’m seeing this confidence in me in every situation.  Impossible to be impatient, hurried, without being confident-I-know-what’s-best.  Impossible to be competitive, wannabe superior.  Impossible to judge others.  The root of all my idolatry/sin, is confidence-I-know-what’s-best.  Jesus and His imputed worthiness are unsatisfying to a worldly/independent/confident-he-knows-what’s-best.  Half the solution is recognizing the problem.  Unconfessed sin is like being an addict and not even knowing it.

—MorePatientThanEverDave, feeling loved on by Jesus

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My flesh wants PAINLESS sanctification!

My flesh (ShepherdDave) is suffering-avoidant, and really wants to be more Jesus-dependent/faith-filled but wants pain-free growth.  What ShepherdDave doesn’t understand, is that suffering produces perseverance, then character, then hope/faith/dependency/humility/contentment.  ShepherdDave doesn’t wanna hear about suffering.  He wants EASY.  None of this harrrd stuff.  No adversity.  Wants everything going his way.

Why does ShepherdDave want to be more faith-filled, fruitful with the lost, Jesus-dependent, holy, godly, obedient, loving, humble?  So he can feel good about himself.  ShepherdDave’s motivation for following Jesus is self-centered.  ShepherdDave is way-more concerned about his own glory, than Jesus’ glory.  The imputed worthiness of Jesus is UNsatisfying to ShepherdDave.  He wants some worthiness of his OWN.

—DumbSheepDave, for the moment, because of fresh conviction of sin, having compassion on pathetic ShepherdDave this morning, because ShepherdDave is so clueless about how to find happiness, but so confident-he-knows, so confident his idols/addictions will deliver

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Wow.

Tears in my eyes.  Makes me wanna move to urban St Louis and be part of Mike Higgins’ church.  I would love for Mike to be my pastor.  I would love to be a part of what Jesus is doing in this church.

http://byfaithonline.com/film-about-pca-pastor-earns-critical-recognition/

I met Mike and Renee when I was their discipler at Sonship Week in 1999 in Chattanooga, when Mike was the Assoc Pastor of New City Fellowship there.  I remember how awkward I felt, as a white guy, trying to tell a black couple about anything spiritual, in light of the paternalistic history of whites toward blacks in America, and in the light of how-much-more suffering black believers have endured.  And I told them that.  They were so gracious toward me.  And then Mike took a church in Atlanta, and now St Louis, while also being Dean of Students at Covenant Seminary.  But Jesus used this film to touch something deep within me. I’m struggling here, trying to explain it.

—Dave McCarty, GospelFriendships

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When I’m freshly bummed

by my idolatry/sin, that’s pride, not humility.  Sin is to be CONFESSed, and if I’m bummed after CONFESSing, there is yet-more to CONFESS that I have not-yet seen.  When I wish I were different, better, that’s pride, not humility.  Jesus is only ENOUGH for me, when I’m content with everything in my life just as it is, and others just as they are.  Curious/expectant to see how He might make a difference in my life, or others’ lives, but not bummed by what is.  THANKful for what is, not bummed, frustrated, fearful.  Bummed, frustrated, fearful evidence pride, not humility.  Only the independent/confident-we-know-what’s-best, can be bummed, are unsatisfied with Jesus, His imputed worthiness, His genius plan for all of us, and know what’s thankable and what’s not.

—CuriousExpectantDave, for the moment, because of the convicting work of the Spirit

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The merciful never view others

with a critical-judgmental spirit.  The merciful are always gracious.  The merciful see losers as having potential.  The merciful enjoy the opposition, even enemies.  The merciful have not a competitive bone in their bodies.  They never rejoice in the failure of others.

—JudgeDave, a great example of a bad example, only merciful to himself and others when he’s been freshly convicted of the sin of pride/independence/confidence-he-knows-what’s-best, so he’s ContentedEnjoyerDave, momentarily content with Jesus and His imputed worthiness, enjoying everyone and everything just as it is, including Jesus’ genius plan for us all

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I’m happiest when I’m a spectator,

not the gladiator on the field of battle, UP TO DAVE.  A spectator to the orchestrations of the CreatorSustainer of the Universe, in me, others, circumstances.  Curious and expectant to see what He does NEXT, in me, others, circumstances.  Not my problem, nor my job to fix.  When the blinders come off by the convicting work of the Spirit, so I recognize what’s going on — I see the unfolding plot of the GreatScriptwriter, I relax, and am enabled to enjoy everyone and everything, just as it is, including my role as a great example of a bad example — a pathetically-dysfunctional follower of Jesus.  I only need to be an activist about anything, when my ReigningShepherdJesus directs me here, or there.  When I’m a spectator — DumbSheepDave, I have amazing peace that has nothing to do with my circumstances, or the troubles in the world.

—SpectatorDave, for the moment, because of fresh conviction by the Spirit of the sin of independence/confidence-he-knows-what’s-best/gladiator-mentality

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