Entries by WeakDave

The ultimate blessing in this life,

is when the Spirit of Jesus opens my eyes to see how pathetically helpless I am — powerless to make my life work, to engineer happiness for myself and those I love. I see this in my saner moments, and then I’m actually thankful for my pathetic helplessness. And enjoy it! Am comforted by it. […]

Fifty years ago, today,

I married my high-school sweetheart, who was by then, my college sweetheart, and today, she’s my senior sweetheart.  I was twenty; she was almost twenty.  Neither of us knew who we were.  But we were in love, and we have stayed in love, for fifty years, plus the two and a half years we dated.  […]

Engineering easy circumstances,

and avoiding the hard ones, is my passion when I’m ShepherdDave, wise in my own eyes, leaning on my own understanding, confident I know what’s best for me and those I love.   But easy never grows me more Jesus-dependent, more DumbSheepDave.  Only the hard.   So why do I obsess over engineering easy, and not embrace […]

Ministry idolatry exposed.

My flesh loves to get LIFE from ministry success, and so Jesus frequently thwarts my plans/efforts so the pain of the failure snaps me back to reality, where freshly convicted of my sin, I also realize that He is lovingly retraining me in a better way to live: dependent on Him, not needing any performance […]

Inviting Jesus into my idolatry areas,

has been a huge blessing, a wunnerful answer to your prayers.  ShepherdDave is so used to confidently/pridefully taking charge of ministry, investments, health management, hobbies, bargains, purchasing decisions, though he is easily irritated with others, himself, circumstances, when things don’t go his way.   But DumbSheepDave doesn’t know what to do with any of it, is […]

I am powerless over my idols/addictions.

I cannot live w/o them.  I become tense and frustrated until I can return to them to get some relief from my pain — my suppressed feelings of worthlessness.  How do I know they’re suppressed?  Because I want to forget/deny/erase my feelings of worthlessness, by doing something to feel good about myself in one or […]

Looking for perfection

in the automotive experience: both in the purchasing and in the owning.  Finding the best used car in my price range — at a bargain price, that can deliver the closest thing to perfection in the driving experience: seating, handling, acceleration, ride, sound isolation, manual transmission, with minimal depreciation on the investment and minimal maintenance/repair […]