Entries by WeakDave

Satan doesn’t want me to see,

the sickness of the Church, but once I see it, he changes his strategy, tempting me to feel good about myself for my insight, smug in my superior and radical commitment, tempting me to self-righteously go about trying to make a difference as a radical, in the power of me.  Like the Pharisees: so confident, […]

The pride nobody confesses.

From mentoring lots of believers over the years, especially grace-junkies, I’m struck by the prevalence of unconfessed self-contempt.  Why is self-contempt not viewed as the prideful sin it is?  I think it’s because it seems right to hate yourself when you sin.  But it’s not.  A humble believer extends grace to self, just like Jesus […]

Terrible, horrible, no-good, very-bad

experience, living in this world as an independent who was made for dependency.  The Creator didn’t do a halfway job when He cursed the world.  It really is an awful place for an independent to live.  Except.  For those moments of sanity, those tastes of Heaven, when created-dependents are returned by the convicting work of […]

“Beware of the leaven of the Pharisees,

which is hypocrisy,” said Jesus.   Hypocrisy?  Trying to appear strong/together.  Dishonest about weaknesses, failure, neediness.  Invisible pride.  Appearing strong/together/un-needy has unconsciously been my main core value all my adult life, I now see.  Nurtured by the society around me, outside the Church, and inside too.  Satan loves the Church operating just like the world around […]

I’m bored with Jesus,

at Christmas, and the rest of the year too, except when I’ve been freshly convicted of the sin of independence/judge/self-confidence/pride.  Jesus is only a big deal to big sinners, only a little deal to little sinners, and nothing to non-sinners.  The nicest, sweetest, kindest thing He ever does for this kid of His, is to […]

Jesus changing Dave in surprising ways.

One example is my latest tire purchase for my car.  My Subaru wagon is an authentic sports car in disguise: very fast, and corners amazingly.   So the tires I have purchased for it in the past, have been ultra-high-performance summer tires, that enable one to corner like a race car.   I have always loved to […]

An ingrate believer,

has been forgiven much by DaddyJesusSpirit, and has the perfect, precious, pricey righteousness of Jesus imputed to him, but — wants something more.  An ingrate believer is unsatisfied with Jesus and His righteousness, wants some righteousness/performance/worthiness of his own, so he can feel good about himself.  IngrateDave. Grace is for ingrates who know they are […]

Financial condition of GospelFriendships.

Financial condition of GospelFriendships.  I’m currently in deficit by $9k and I’m guessing by year end it will be from $10-15k.   🙂 I need a ministry fix. My ministry addiction is clearer to me than ever.  Why?  Because folks have been praying.  Why is my addiction always eager for a fresh, quick fix?  Why can’t […]